


In My Dreams

by Braggsticks



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: M/M, Mavin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-29
Updated: 2014-03-29
Packaged: 2018-01-17 10:00:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1383373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Braggsticks/pseuds/Braggsticks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Rooster Teeth Company head out to the theater for a big movie night, but Michael Jones is mixing realty with dreams and when he remembers the truth…nothing is alright again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In My Dreams

                        “Rubbish.”

            That one word was enough to make Michael turn and shoot the man a glare, “What?” He’d put himself close enough to Gavin where their noses were almost touching, but the theater was dark and none of their friends would notice with them being seated behind most of them. Not that it mattered because this closeness was usual for them in the office, even out of it.

            “I said rubbish,” Gavin had already been facing Michael, hence the closeness and his green eyes were locked with his glare, “That’s what I think about this whole plot.”

            Michael rolled his eyes, but went straight back to glaring, “Then why are you here? You’ve seen it before.”

            Gavin scrunched his nose up at the question, “Because everyone wanted to go see it.”

            Michael opened his mouth to respond, but got a hiss from Tina next to him so he made a soft noise and pressed closer so his mouth was by Gavin’s ear, “Then you should’ve said something and we could’ve seen something else.”

            Gavin turned his head to mirror the action, whispering into Michael’s ear, “But _you_ wanted to see it.”

            Michael let out a groan and sat back in his seat, “Then shut the fuck up and watch it.”

            Tina elbowed him this time and he shot her a glare, but she held a hand out to the screen while giving him one back. Both actions silencing the king of rage to sulk into his seat and eat his popcorn in silence, eyes on the movie.

            Gavin next to him had let out a sigh, but overall sat up in his seat to watch the movie as well. He shifted and his knee bumped Michael’s, but he made no effort to move it which made the man push into it with his own. The Brit shot Michael a glare and he got one in return so Gavin put his arm on the armrest, shoving Michael’s from it.

            “You son of—” he cut off when Ray let out a noise of shushing from the other side of Tina. He glared at his friend before elbowing Gavin’s arm off the rest, “Fuck off, you prick.”

            Gavin kicked his foot against Michael’s while giving a glare; the kick had caused the popcorn to almost fall and Michael huffed. He sat up in his seat and shoved his bucket at Tina who made a noise of complaint, but it fell on deaf ears as Michael was pushing Gavin’s head down. He gave a squawk which had heads turning to silence them, but neither were paying attention as Michael’s free hand grabbed the back of Gavin’s shirt to pull it up and over his head.

            “Guys, really,” Barbara had turned in her seat to look at them both, “You’re going to get kicked out.”

            Gavin was working to make a noise so Michael’s hand, now free of his head, was covering his mouth to keep that sound in. His other hand went to the shirt covered head and his foot moved out to hook his leg. He pulled it out and it forced the Brit further down in bending over. He made another noise against Michael’s hand, but the man didn’t let him up.

            “Quit fuckin’ around,” Tina said it in a hissed whisper, but Michael didn’t look at her.

            Gavin had a hand on the back of Barbara’s seat and the other on the armrest while making noises into Michael’s hand.

            “Do it again, Gavin,” Michael grumbled out, “I dare you.” He let go of him and slid his hand away to wipe it on Gavin’s shoulder before returning back to his seat. Tina slammed the bucket back into him and Michael wanted to glare at her, but he was busy watching Gavin shoot up straight and fix his shirt. He could see that the Brit was a bit red faced from the head rush and being somewhat unable to breathe properly, but overall he looked frazzled. _Shows him to take my armrest_. Michael put his elbow back on the divider for the seats and went about eating his popcorn again as Gavin stayed sitting without his back against his seat.

            After about ten minutes Gavin sat back and turned quickly to pull Michael’s beanie down before standing to rush from the theater, luckily having taken the end seat in the back to let him get quick fleeing access.

            “Motherfucker,” Michael had let the popcorn go and it fell from his lap to explode on the floor. He pushed his beanie back up and fixed his glasses while ignoring the complaints of others around them so he could stand and leave as well. He left in a haste to find the Brit, completely ignoring the call of the others after him.

            He exited the theater to immediately trip over someone’s held out leg. He tripped forward and hit the wall a little ways off, hands catching his form to keep it from slamming into it. He turned his head slowly with a growl to see Gavin standing there with a cheeky grin across his face, “I’m going to fucking kill you.” He shoved off the wall and Gavin’s smile fell as he quickly hopped to run from the area.

            Michael was hot after him and not letting up despite the Brit being quick on his feet. He chased him right out of the establishment and down the street until the lankier tripped over his own feet and twisted to where he slammed into the side of a building. Michael dove after him and caught his middle, toppling them both over to the sidewalk below. Michael landed on Gavin and a coughed yelped rose out of his friend, but he stayed holding him. He only slid away enough to where he was holding Gavin’s wrists to the ground and his knees were on either side of his hips. He glared down at him and waited until Gavin was aware of the situation before speaking, “You’ve got a death wish, don’t you?”

            Gavin looked up at him with wide eyes for a brief moment before letting out a gurgled chuckle, “You’re too easy to rile up, Micool.”

            “I’m missing the movie because of you fuckwad,” Michael growled at him.

            “Then why’d you chase after me?”

            “Because I had to wipe that stupid fucking grin off your cheeky big nosed face.”

            Gavin’s lips fell away from their grin, “Hey, I take offense to that.”

            “As you should you bitch ass fuck,” Michael’s brow was furrowed together and he was glaring at him, “You made a fucking mess.”

            Gavin was back to smiling and laughing lightly in amusement again, eyes closed as he rolled his head a bit with the action.

            “I’m sorry, but did I say something funny? Or did you want to stay on this gross sidewalk all night?” Michael snarled and Gavin opened his eyes, “Well?”

            He let out a throaty laugh as he answered, “Like I said: You’re way too easily riled up.”

            Michael let out a frustrated noise, but pushed off of his wrists to sit up on his knees, “Fuck you too then.” He got up on his feet and turned to walk away, “You can stay here then, I’m going back to the fucking movie and my floor popcorn.”

            Gavin had risen up too with that cheeky grin still and let out a sigh, “Micool.”

            Michael looked over his shoulder at him, “What?”

            “For God’s sake would you kiss me already?” Gavin asked it with a smile and a light in his eyes.

            Michael’s eyes widened a bit at the question, chest tightening and heart stopping. He stayed still a long moment before narrowing his eyes to speak coldly, “Why the fuck would I kiss you? Did you hit your head or something? I said kill you not kiss you.”

            Gavin rolled his eyes and stepped forward; he grabbed hold of Michael by the front of his sweatshirt and pulled him the short distance so their lips could meet.

            Michael’s eyes went back to being wide and he held his hands up by the sides of his head while staying planted; he wasn’t sure how to react. Or what to do. Yet Gavin was holding to him tight and moving his lips to work against Michael’s which after a moment were molding right into his. His wide eyes eventually shut and he returned the kiss with a mellowed head that had him placing his hands on Gavin’s sides. His lips moved with Gavin’s to let the kiss drag out longer there on the Austin sidewalk.

            After a moment Gavin pulled back to kiss his chin and smooth out the front of his clothing. He placed another kiss to his chin then his lips where the kiss turned from a peck to something more for a short moment before the Brit was pulling back once more. He opened his eyes to look at Michael’s relaxed face and he smiled to himself.

            “For the record,” Michael said quietly, opening his eyes to look at Gavin, “I still really want to kill you.”

            “Kill me later,” Gavin moved his hands up to cup his neck, forehead bumping to his, “Kiss me now.”

            Michael nodded at that and had wanted to outwardly say it was a good idea, but instead he lifted a hand to Gavin’s hair and twisted his own head to kiss him deeply and hungrily. He’d never really thought about it before, the idea of kissing Gavin, but here he was and God did it feel amazing. The kiss was setting his body on fire and electric currents shot through him when their tongues met; bodies pushing into one another’s so that no air could pass through them. The shorter of the two broke the kiss for a moment so he could breathe, but he was back at it a few seconds later with both hands in Gavin’s hair and body rolling into his. He broke away with a pant, “I swear I’m going to fucking kill you.”

            Gavin smiled breathlessly and pushed his nose against Michael’s, “I look forward to it.”

            “Good because it’ll happen,” Michael was kissing him again, kissing profoundly and hurriedly. He pulled away once, “And you won’t see it coming.” His lips assaulted his again briefly then, “But right now I need…” his mouth worked to find Gavin’s and the Brit caught his bottom lop between his teeth to bite it, “Fuck, Gavin. Let me finish.”

            “I think you’ve talked enough,” Gavin breathed out then pushed in for a deep kiss that he directed and moved with, leading Michael into another one that would leave them breathless.

            Michael drew away again, but the time spent apart was brief as his lips worked like magnets to find Gavin’s again. He hadn’t realized just how amazing this would be, didn’t know how great Gavin’s lips would feel against his. He didn’t want to stop to finish what he had been saying because Gavin was right, he’d talked enough. Wasted enough time in their friendship with pointless drabble that could’ve been something else, something he hadn’t even noticed until this very moment with Gavin against him.

            Gavin had known something was there when Michael hadn’t, had known there was more to this friendship that he wasn’t seeing, and now it was more apparent than ever to Michael just how much he had craved this. How much he had needed to know what it felt like to kiss him, to hold him, to have him as his own.

            Michael broke away, “Be mine, Gavin.”

            “I’ve been yours for a long time, boi,” Gavin spoke out quietly and smiled there in the dark of the street, heart feeling like it was ready to explode, “Just been waiting for you to see that.”

            Michael’s long unnoticed feelings were coming out in plumes of fire and debris, falling around him and clouding up his head with nothing but the thought of Gavin. He slid a hand to the man’s cheek and pushed his forehead back to his, “Should’ve said something sooner.”

            Gavin kept his eyes closed and was working to rein in his level of joy, “I had to be sure myself. I wasn’t sure if I was right. I didn’t know if it was possible that for even a second you would—you would want this too. I didn’t know whether to keep it hidden or to—”

            “Gavin, stop talking,” Michael slammed his mouth back into his and instantly pulled it into a kiss that would leave them both gasping for air, but also leave them wanting to never let the other go again. His mouth moved in twists with Gavin’s, tongues meeting every so often and hands pressing to hold the other so that they couldn’t break apart. It was a moment that seemed almost too surreal, too perfect, too right…too dreamlike.

            Dreamlike…right…perfect…surreal…Gavin…

            When Michael drew back this time he held only the air around him and his eyes opened to see just that. To see that there was nothing, but the empty sidewalk in front of him. No one stood there with him and that warm feeling of being held was slipping away.

            “Michael…”

            The tingling feeling of being kissed was already going numb on his lips and the soft feel of Gavin’s hair that had tickled his fingers was gone.

            “Michael…”

            He was alone. Gavin wasn’t there. He hadn’t been in a long time.

            “Michael…”

            He closed his eyes, fighting back that realization.

            “Wake up…”

            Michael’s eyes opened and he was looking at the faces of his friends as they stood around him in high class attire. They were all looking at him with concern in their eyes. He sat up and sniffed, straightening in his seat, “Is the movie over?”

            Barbara was the first one to move and immediately she was in the seat next to him so her arms could wind around him; head resting on his suit covered shoulder and hand rubbing his arm.

            “What? What’s wrong?” Michael looked to her then the others, but instead of a verbal response Ray was holding a napkin out to him and Michael furrowed his brow. He raised a hand up and touched below the rim of his glasses. His cheeks were wet; he’d been crying. A tear hit his fingertip, no…he _was_ crying. He raised his other hand to his other cheek and his lip quivered, “I’m fine…I-I…I’m fine.”

            There was a look of pain that fell across the group standing there and it was Geoff who moved next from where he was a row down. He carefully climbed over the chairs no bother or care to the fancy attire that he was wearing. Tina stepped out of his way and he took the seat next to him and moved to put a hand to his back, “It’s okay, buddy. We miss him too.”

            Michael’s lip started to quiver more at the words and his tears pooled over even faster, his head dropped forward and his breathing started to pick up faster as it all settled onto him again. The memory of Gavin against him now nothing more than a flicker in his head. He closed his eyes and let out a sob, falling into his hands and letting his shoulders shake violently while the tears leaked from between his hands and hit upon the floor.

            Barbara had moved her head to his shoulder blade and was closing her eyes to hold back her own tears as Geoff continued to rub his back. The others around them were either turning to hold back their own emotions or were leaning into each other. Griffon who stood a bit off from them was leaning against Jack with a hand over her mouth as the man held both her and Caiti. Kerry had his head bowed with Stacey rubbing his arm as she held it; Miles and Arryn were next to them with their heads leaning into each other; Matt and his wife were facing away from the group, standing on the steps to watch the credits roll past on the screen; Burnie was a step above them with a red face from trying to rein in his own emotions as Ashley leaned into his chest; the others were there too. All of them.

            The whole company had turned out for the Austin premier of a movie that had been based around the evolution of Slow Motion. A movie with actual characters and a plot, a dumb fucking plot that made no sense. But it had Slow Motion. It had plenty of it and it had been one man who had taken to that task after being specifically asked to do so.

            Gavin Free.

            He was the reason all the members of Rooster Teeth now stood in the theater in their best and he was also the reason that they had to listen to one member sob loudly.

            Michael hadn’t quieted. He couldn’t. He was letting it all wash over him again, letting every realization that Gavin was gone to fall onto him. He was filling his head with memories of his laugh, memories of his smiles, and memories of those kisses they shared whenever they could. He could hear him saying his name, breathing it out in his sleep; and could hear those words which had only graced him once. Only once had he heard Gavin ever speak three words which broke him into wanting to spend his life with him. And it had been the last time Gavin had ever said those words.

            _“I love you.”_

            Michael could hear it, could hear those words like a whisper in his head before they blew away with every other memory he had of the man he’d given his heart to. Each one being pulled and ripped at to where he could see nothing, but the peaceful expression he wore as he lied in his casket that day two months ago. Lying there so still with life not blessing his tanned skin any longer, lying there with lips painted to make him look more alive, but there was no life there. Not anymore. He was gone and Michael was left alone without him. He had collapsed at Gavin’s casket just as he had collapsed when George had called to tell him…and now he was collapsing again. The only thing that was keeping him up was the seat he sat in and Barbara’s arms around him. He was still crying and didn’t think he could bring himself to stop, couldn’t bring himself to brave a smile.

            A smile no one has seen in months. A smile that died the day Gavin was taken from him. A smile that was meant for one person who could no longer see it.

            “What did you folks think of the movie?”

            The voice took them all, but Matt and his wife, by surprise. It belonged to the director of the film and he wore a large grin that immediately fell away when he saw the somber looks of the group. He glanced to each face that had turned to him and his smile was gone completely when he looked back to Matt who was frowning at him, “Your movie was shit.”

            He paled, “What?”

            “It sucked,” Burnie snapped from behind Matt, face still red behind his glasses, “It was stupid and didn’t even really hit on what the point of it was.”

            “The only good parts were the actual slow motion,” Gus said it from his seat, eyes on the dark screen in front of him, “The stuff Gavin did.”

            “It was rubbish, as Gavin would say,” Ryan spoke up from near Jack, “Total colossal waste of time.”

            Michael listened to them all, sobs silencing, but tears still falling. He sniffed in and then rose after a moment which cut off Geoff in mid rant about the movie.

            “Michael,” Barbara spoke softly, but the man moved past her legs and down the steps to come to a stop in front of the director.

            Michael held a hand out to him, “Thank you.”

            The director looked at the red faced man before gently taking his hand, “For what?”

            “Making something that the whole world will see,” Michael’s tears were now welling to blind his sight, “Something that will have his name flashed across it. Something that will make more than those who already know him…discover who he is.” He sniffed in, “Your movie was fucking dumb, but at least his name is attached to something more than just a quickly passed name in the credits.”

            “You’re Michael, aren’t you?”

            Michael froze up a bit, but swallowed and that welled up wetness dropped, “Y-yes.”

            “He talked about you,” the director let his hand go and reached into his jacket, pulling out an envelope that he handed over to him, “I…found this. With his stuff he’d left on set. I didn’t read it beyond your name.” He paused as he held it out, “I’m sorry my movie didn’t live up to all your standards and I’m sorry…about Gavin. He was a good lad.”

            Michael took the envelope from him and quickly turned to move down the steps some, leaving the director standing there without another word. He tore it open and pulled the folded paper out. He dropped the envelope to the ground and held the paper in both hands, trembling as he read it to himself; Gavin’s accent a whisper in his ear.

 

            _Hi Michael,_

_I know I could just text this to you, but let’s be honest: I’ll forget if I don’t write it down and I currently don’t have my phone. So we’re going back a bit in time for this one, but that’s alright. Might mean more than a text._

_Anyways, what I wanted to tell you was that when I get back to Texas the first thing I’m going to do is take you from the office and straight to your apartment where I’m going to lock the door, shut the blinds, and turn off all the lights. I’m going to trip over myself to find you in the dark and once I do I’m going to kiss you all over while telling you I love you. Because I meant it. I meant it more than you will ever realize and to hear you say it back was the best thing to happen to me. First it had been you kissing me back that night outside the theater and making my dreams come true, but hearing you say that you love me is the greatest thing. Michael, I love you and I don’t ever want to go anywhere without you. So when we’re in the dark of your apartment and I’m kissing you endlessly I’m going to tell you how the next time I board a plane you’ll be right there next to me. You’ll come with me to where I need to because I can’t be away from you. We’ll always be together. It’s been three days, Michael! Three bloody days and I miss you more than I ever thought possible._

_I’m lucky I wrote this all down. This would’ve been one long text message. I’m not done thought. I think I can keep going._

_So I had to stop for a bit there, you wouldn’t know that though. That’s why I’ve told you this. I had to stop for some filming, but all the while I was filming that bloody stupid as hell love scene in the rain all I could think about was you and how great I feel when you hold me. It hurts being this far away from you and it makes me wonder if you feel the same way. Do you lie awake thinking about me like I do you? Do you eat a meal and wonder if I’d like it as I do for you? Do you yearn for my kiss like I do for yours? I’m going to stop before I turn into Shakespeare. The point is Michael that I am happy. I am happy because I have you and you love me. I’m in love with you and I always have been, I have been for so long and telling you has just made this so much more real to me. I can’t wait to get home where you are. You are my home, Michael. You are my everything and I love you._

_Your boi,_

_Gavvy-Wavvy_

Michael collapsed in the theater, falling to his knees as tears dropped and speckled the paper. He heard someone running down the steps to grab him before he fell completely over, hands gripping his arms from behind, but he didn’t turn to them. He stared at the last sentence of the letter. The words standing out more than anything and it racked through Michael as he let out a loud shout of frustration. He glared at the paper in his hands, shaking all over and tears falling in heated streaks, “You bastard. You fucking mingy prick. Who gave you the right? Who said you could die?”

            “Michael,” Burnie’s voice was in his ear, but he wasn’t listening as his teeth clenched.

            “You left me!” Michael screamed it at the paper and he cried out again, “You left me here alone! Where’s our always being together now? Huh, Gavin?! Where the fuck is it?!”

            A hand fell on his cheek and he looked up to see Griffon was crouched in front of him with red eyes threatening to drop tears.

            “He left me, Griffon,” Michael hushed out with his throat burning, “He said he loved me and then he left me.”

            “I know, Michael, I know,” Griffon nodded, “But it wasn’t his fault. He would’ve never left you if he had that choice.”

            Michael hiccupped, sniffing in hard, “I miss him.”

            “I know,” Griffon said it shakily, tears starting to slip out, “We miss him too.”

            “I just…I wish I had known…that o-our goodbye w-was o-our last one,” Michael felt arms slip around him again and this time it was Ashley who was hugging him, rubbing his shoulder as Burnie rubbed his arms.

            “It’s better that you didn’t know, buddy,” Burnie said it lightly and Griffon nodded in agreement.

            “I want him back,” Michael sniffed in and looked up at the newest person who had come over, eyes lifting up to see Geoff, “I want Gavin here.”

            Geoff crouched down and put a hand on his head, pushing his hair down some, “You can’t have that, Michael. I’m sorry.”

            Michael’s mouth hung open for a moment, but then he let it close and his head slowly dropped forward. He let his sobs and tears take over him once more, let himself be taken into his broken and lost heart. He fell into that dream which had brought the tears in the first place, went back to that kiss they shared on the sidewalk. Went back to when Gavin was telling him to kiss him, back to when Gavin was making him realize what he hadn’t been aware to. Back to when Gavin was alive. When Gavin was the only person who mattered to him. He yearned to go back to the past to where he could hold the man and say he loved him, tell him he loved him over and over and to tell him that he’d go anywhere with him. Because he was his everything and he loved him.

           

            _Hi Gavin,_

_You won’t ever read this letter, but that’s alright because I know it won’t matter soon. Soon enough I’ll be able to tell you myself. It’s been years since that day where I broke harder than I had at your funeral. Years that I’ve spent still missing you and days that I spent trying to go on with my life. I never moved on. I couldn’t. People were always telling me that it’s what you wanted; that you’d want me happy, but they didn’t know you like I did. You were a selfish bastard and I was yours, even in death._

_I thought about you every single day. Thought about what you’d be doing, what you’d be saying, how you’d react, and overall I thought about how I would never stop watching you to know these. I realized that I would’ve never been able to go about my life if I didn’t have you always there. We both know that technically I had to though, didn’t I? I had to go on without you, but really I never did. I never got over you dying and I spent many nights lying awake because I missed you so much. I would go days without sleep and tell everyone I was fine. Not sure if they believed me or not, but it didn’t matter because I was fine. As fine as I could be._

_You said in your letter that you wanted me to go with you everywhere. That you didn’t want to be without me ever and I would like to apologize for that. I apologize because I was not there when you died and I am not there now. I had debated many times over about taking my own life, taking a way out just so I could be with you again. I didn’t thought because I knew you wouldn’t want that. You wouldn’t want me to die. You’d want me to live a life, but a life where I was still yours. So I did, but Gavin no one saw it coming and it took us all by surprise._

_Fucking stupid really, you’d think that people would learn to not drink and drive eventually. That bastard probably hadn’t even made it two streets before plowing into my car. He’s dead and I plan on punching his dead fucking face when I see him again, but until then I plan on just lying here and waiting for the pearly white gates to show themselves to me. Is that even real? Are there pearly gates? Chorus of angels? Or is there just you? Is it bad I’m sort of leaning towards that last one?_

_I don’t need all the great glory of heaven. I just need you. I’ve only ever needed you. And by now I suppose if you were reading this you’d figure out that I’m dying. Hu-fucking-zzah. Congrats, you’ve figured it out. I’m dying. Doc says I probably won’t see the end of the week. The only thing I can move is my mouth got some real bad brain damage and on life support. Now here’s the kicker, right? How am I writing? I’m not! I’ve got Lindsay here doing it. She’s been great support and all that. She’s crying and I think I am too, but I can’t tell. God this letter is long. I should get to the point before I kick the bucket, shouldn’t I? Point in case: I missed you Gavin and I never stopped loving you. Not once. Not ever. You are still my everything and I love you more than ever. I’ll see you soon._

_Your Boi,_

_Micool_


End file.
